When Animals Attack

Earlier last week, I was sitting on the couch watching television, and I suddenly felt a strange sensation on my hand. I looked down and let out a loud screech. It was a mosquito, busily preparing to suck my blood. This was unusual, because normally I never get bit by one, it is always Hubba-hubba they are attracted to. I managed to swat it off, but not kill it. I knew it was still hanging around, and that it was still hungry. So I took a blanket and covered everything but my head.

A short time later, Hubba-hubba walked out of our bedroom where he had beeen studying. I informed him there was a mosquito in the house and he casually asked me if I was referring to the one that was sitting on the wall right behind me. That's right, thwarted in its first attempt, it was simply waiting me out. Eventually, it must have thought, this chick is gonna have to go the bathroom or something, and when she does, I will be there.

Hubba-hubba, being the bug squasher around here, dispatched his duty.

Then last night, I was sitting at the table finishing up dinner with Mr. P while Hubba-hubba was at the sink rinsing the dishes. I felt a large and somewhat painful something "thwap" me on the side of my head. I protested to Hubba-hubba that he had thrown something at me and quite frankly, why the hell he would do something like that. He claimed complete innocence, and for once I sorta believed him. But man, something had totally whapped me on the side of the head! I rubbed the side of my head and pondered why the universe would be playing tricks on me.

We sat there for another five minutes or so when Mr. P shouted that there was something on the floor. Sure enough, a semi-stunned cricket was slowly pacing around the floor. It must have been startled by something and managed to turn itself into a projectile. Again, Hubba-hubba's services were dispatched.

I don't know what I have done to prompt such revenge from the animal kingdom, but apparently, they have all gotten the memo.

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