So it started out very small, like it always does. A little nagging tickle, but easily dismissed. Then over time, it built up into something I couldn't ignore, yet at the same time couldn't exactly diagnose what was bothering me. Finally, I have figured out my malady, one that has now been progressing for about a month.
It is the dreaded Bloggis Envitus.
That's right, I'm jealous of everyone else's new blog templates.
I don't know exactly who it began with, although eb is constantly changing her template around. Or AC, who changes his templates with the season. Perhaps it was Mel, who upon moving to WordPress got all fancy-schmancy on me, with a photo-montage header. Then I found Kvetch, with her cool design, and Mega Mom got in on the new-template action as well. Melissa's, Heather's, and other blogs leave my simple color-tweaking in the dust. And J's and Liz's blogs have always looked better than mine, as has Suzanne's at Mimilou.
I have asked myself why I feel this inadequacy about my blog design. I mean, there is nothing technically wrong with it, it is just boring as hell. It is possible that it is tied to some deep-seated dissatisfaction with my hair or something, but the psychiatrist's couch will have to wait. I tried to tell myself that I just simply don't have the time or the resources to be wasting on this blog, no matter how much I love it. And it seems that lately, my life has been getting slowly sucked more and more into blogging, although that is an entirely different post. The patience required to try and figure out how to put up a new header just isn't in me at this point in time. And really, I don't have any money to pay someone to make it all purty for me, or for a new hosting service.
I sit here and remind myself that it is the content of my blog that matters. The "inner beauty" that everyone can see, shining out like a beacon despite the rather dull exterior.
After some serious soul-searching, I've decided that I'm ok with being the Phyllis Diller of blogdom. Really.