Thursday, August 25, 2005

Napping is an Outdated Business Practice

From the Desk of Mr. Personality

Our hostile takeover bid, still in its initial phase, seems to be going quite well. Long meetings conducted over warm juice boxes and cold macaroni and cheese questioned the wisdom to launch "Operation No Nap" and despite some of the initial concerns, it has executed perfectly.

The days of meekly climbing into bed and falling asleep are gone, my friends. In their place, a seemingly never ending 12 hour fun-a-thon! Too engrossed in your Bob the Builder playset to bother with the whole "close your eyes and go to sleep" routine? No problem, "Operation No Nap" or ONN, has forever solved that problem. No longer does the day have to be interrupted smack dab in the middle by that outdated institution known as "The Nap."

By far the most interesting aspect of this project is the effect on subject A, aka Mom. Today, desperate for a respite from our incessant screeching of the entire Raffi catalogue while jumping on the couch, she actually pleaded with us to lay down. If you want to know what power is, just look into the eyes of a mother who has been defeated by the omnipotent ONN. She tries to wheedle, she tries to bribe, but nothing will work, and deep down she knows it.

The acquisition of the continuous 12 hour day is almost complete. And for those who say that we will indeed succumb to the siren call of the soft pillows and comfy blankets, we say- Bring it ONN!

4 comments:

Suzanne said...

I think your guy and my guy have been working on this takeover bid together. Sean seems to have implemented ONN a bit earlier, and Mr. Personality will be glad to know that after 4 months it seems to have taken hold very efficiently.

I, of course, could use a nap daily, but that goes without saying.

Mel said...

Very funny! My daughter went on a four month nap strike when she was a year old. That was hell!

Piece of Work said...

Ha Ha Ha Ha!
(But I beg you to intercept any memos en route from Mr. Personality to Isaac. PLEASE!)

WordsRock said...

Napping is sacred. It was the first real lesson I taught my son. He agrees, to this day. :)

Suzanne