Thursday, April 07, 2005

Randomness

Whoever was in the focus group for Quizno's that lied and said the baby with the fake moving lips was cute, I would like a word with you. That poor semi-stoned looking baby gives me the heebie-jeebies and has prompted a vow from me to never visit the inside of one of their shops.

My sister said the other day that she felt like starting a new political party. She said she was going to call it "The Common Sense Party." I think that has a nice ring to it. There sure seems to be a lack of it up on Capitol Hill and its environs.

We have a nesting dove on a ledge just above our patio. Yesterday, I was unaware that she was there. She must have really wanted to strangle her real estate agent, because Mr. Personality was in truly fine form. Between the tactics of "if I'm not looking at you, I can't hear you," grabbing the hose and spraying every possible surface, along with throwing handfuls of sand everywhere, it was not pretty.

I have absolutely no clue why Hubba-hubba does not understand that I don't like to kiss anyone until I have brushed my teeth. Love may be blind, but it can still smell.

In order to complement the shiner on his eye, Mr. Personality outdid himself. We allowed him to walk around the perimeter of a circular fountain that was oh, a foot or so off the ground. We figured, what could go wrong as long as he was walking? Well, he happened to be so fascinated with a man talking on his cell phone that he forgot to look where he was going and literally missed the curve. One second we could see his little head, and the next it was gone. He walked right off the edge and banged up his chin. Luckily, no blood. I swear he is his father's child.

Our esteemed governor, Arnold Schwarzenneger, needs to go. Now. If our state wasn't so busted broke, I would gladly hold another recall election to kick his butt out of office. Between raising money for ballot inititatives to be voted on by Californians on the East Coast(WTF?) and attacking nurses, teachers, cops and firefighters as "special interests" the disenchantment grows stronger every day. And you can't blame me because I voted for Gallagher.

I have discovered that third-party coercion works with Mr. Personality. AllI have to say is, "Oh, Grandpa would just love it if you ate those green beans" or "Auntie thinks that you should wear your helmet when you ride your tricycle." It works wonders that my own prompting could never accomplish. Does that make me bad?

I am ashamed to confess that while watching the opening credits of "The Apprentice" I find The Donald oddly attractive. Let it be known that I am in no way a gold-digger kind of woman who finds powerful men attractive simply because they are powerful. I'm all about looks. I'm shallow that way.

2 comments:

WordsRock said...

I'm so with you on no kisses until teeth are brushed.

But Gina... The Donald? Don't you think you should have stopped at "odd"?

Tell your sister there is a vast movement for "The Common Sense Party" already underway here in Georgie's backyard. The momentum is growing. Come on America, let's embrace REALITY again!

Suzanne

Piece of Work said...

I have to try your 3rd party tactic! My son is always much better behaved for his grandparents, maybe just mentioning their name will do the trick!

And, Donald? Ick!

But count me in for the COmmon Sense Party.